| hello zazou

The train lulls me to sleep most mornings, if it's quiet enough. I love the train, it's the best form of public transportation. It's clean, always on time, dependable and best of all, there's a silent understanding among most passengers that the train is a quiet place. Unlike buses, trains are not at the mercy of traffic, and unlike the metro, trains are well ventilated and air conditioned and I can stare out of the window at the passing scenery and daydream.

There's a stretch of green between two stations that's my favourite. I often see deer there, which always makes me excited. I've lived my entire life in the city and you don't see deer in the city. Raccoons, skunks, rabbits, maybe. But not deer. Ever. Not long ago, I saw a fawn standing, bewildered next to the tracks. I hope it went back into the green and into safety.

I've got to learn how to relax more. I'm not a busy person by any stretch of the imagine, but I suffer from two debilitating affections: not being able to shut my brain off, and anxiety-based procrastination. Two separate issues that occasionally get tangled. At least only the latter is self-destructive. A friend suggested I take a "relaxing bath", so I said, "yes, dear friend, I shall try that". Except I ran the water, sank into the steamy bubbles and only lasted about two minutes before thinking "I'm bored and pruny" and wanted to get out.

But... I have my quiet morning train rides, so there's that.